The ever expanding awareness of self, life, love.
My love of nature, the rich black earth, springy under my feet mile after mile on the Superior Hiking Trail, and the ongoing process of growth, reflection, maturation, an unfurling into who we are meant to be. Becoming. Embodied. Life worth living.
I didn’t realize until after we named her that ferns were recognized as a symbol of fertility, and often used as an ‘old fashioned name’ however long ago.
Oh, how I’ve discovered that ‘Suffering is fertile.’ If we choose, anyway.
My work, I’m sure, will never be the same, although birth and motherhood have intensified my devotion, depth and specificity of my teachings and explorations. I am on the same path as always and see now the buds of fruits of the many years I laid down the soil, watered it and kept watch.
I’m intimately aware now, too, of the missing matriarchal line in my family, and how much I desire for her to feel connected to women, to lineage, to me, to my mother.
She’s a year old now, walking and chomping along with her two bottom teeth having finally emerged, and I find myself nostalgic for the early dark days of quietness, and the in between worlds-ness that happens for a woman rebirthing her Self into motherhood.
We feel the light when she laughs, our hearts warm and big beaming smiles across all of our faces. It fascinates me how she picks up details, knows what a cat is, points to things in books when prompted to fine them, and uses sign language. She’s brilliant. Joy, embodied. At least the vast majority of the time, thank goodness.
I love you, Jason.
The yielding, rooting and reaching toward the light continues.
Thank you all for celebrating her birthday with us.
And I promise to continue to share the joys and lessons with you all as it relates to self study, practice and embodied living.